


My Sassy Cat Burglar

by Toozmanykids



Series: Second Chances [2]
Category: British Actor RPF, Tom Hiddleston Fandom
Genre: Bad Parenting, Cat Burglar, F/M, Gen, Tom Has A Sweet Tooth, cold/flu season, don't listen to the cats bc they lie, don't make me get off this couch, don't mess with Tom's treats, good parenting, horizontal parenting, it was an inside job, neglected pets, parenting while sick, questionable parenting, starving pets, the cats typed out some of these tags
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-02-21
Updated: 2019-02-21
Packaged: 2019-11-02 00:53:32
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 818
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17877968
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Toozmanykids/pseuds/Toozmanykids
Summary: It's not always that the kids are being naughty. They just don't believe you when you say, "No."  How do you encourage and praise independence one moment, then scold them for being proactive the next? There's no way to win, so better save up for therapy later.Just don't eat all the brownies!!!!!





	My Sassy Cat Burglar

**Author's Note:**

> This is actually just a tiny little short story about my own daughter that I wrote about a year ago. True story!!!! I showed it to my husband, and he looks at me with a look of confusion. "When does Tom Hiddleston come into it?" *eye roll with a groan. This is just a little story about your daughter today. No Tom.
> 
> BUT @largebeeffriedrice actually had talked me into writing an alternative ending with Tom, which is kinda how I got the whole My Very Own Doubtful Guest into my head. I couldn't stop thinking about him in my kitchen.
> 
> So today I've edited it to be about little Melody. Tom is still staying with them, but he's not home in Chapter One. This takes place after My Very Own Doubtful Guest (which is WIP still obviously,) but before The Not-So-Jolly Accident.

Melody peeked into the living room, spying me asleep on the couch. I no longer had a fever, so Tom went back to work that day. I was laying on the couch though, because my head was still aching and my throat was sore. 

Mind you, if a mother is dozing, that never guarantees that she doesn't hear every single sound around her. I could easily discern Melody's footsteps as she quietly padded back into the kitchen. Her tiptoes sounded completely different from Matty's patters or the twins shuffles. 

She pulled a chair slowly to the fridge. The floor was filthy again, so moving any chair silently on that nasty floor was impossible. Between the spilt sugar, ground up chips and crackers, and dripped strawberry smoothie for added stickiness, the chair pads made a loud grinding squeal for the entire 18 inches that she dragged the chair.

My little burglar paused, listening for any sign of life from me, I'm sure. Yet I wasn't going to move a muscle, unless I had to. Once she'd concluded that her stealth hadn't been compromised, she stepped up onto the chair to reach the treasures on fridge-top. The chair creaked more than the floor as she carefully shifted her weight from foot to foot, then back down into the floor. 

She was actually getting very good at this. With her recent growth spurt, a whole world of goodies was suddenly within her reach. The cabinets and shelves had never been more interesting to her than they were now. But I knew exactly what she was seeking this time.

Earlier this morning, she had already asked me if she could have a brownie at 10am. Actually, her request started with, "Can I have one of Uncle Tommy's York Mint Patties?" 

"No." I don't think she was surprised by my answer to that. I may not have even needed to be conscious to provide that answer. Those were Tom's special treats for when he thought he deserved a prize, just in case no one else had a better reward ready for him. 

"Then can I have a brownie?" 

"No!" I actually had to glance at the time before I answered that one. I have been desperately trying to be more of a 'yes' person. I truly have. But no one needs brownies at 10am. 

"Then, what CAN I have?"

No shock to her, I'm sure, I sternly retorted my standard answer, "How about REAL food?"

In turn, my sassy little thing stomped off in a melodramatic huff. "I'll just starve then!" 

So a few hours later, after playing outside and making sandwiches for her and the boys, I didn't mind if she finally had that brownie she wanted. I hadn't heard any fighting. That was a rarity any day. So far that day she'd been a great big sister.

As soon as I heard the brownie wrapper pull open, I hollered out to her, "If you're going to have a brownie..." I paused and she stopped rustling the brownie wrapper. "Do you hear me?" 

A quiet little "yes" squeaked out of the kitchen. 

"Please put the brownie box back up on the fridge-top when you're done. If the babies get into the brownies, they'll eat them all. And Uncle Tommy will be heart broken." 

No answer. "Do you hear me? Don't leave that box on the table. OK?" 

“OK."

After that, this mom's dozing-radar went off high alert, and I drifted back off to sleep - until I heard more plastic rustling.

Rustle. Rustle. Rustle. 

Dammit Melody! I couldn't trust her to help at all!

I knew those babies would devour all the brownies. It wouldn't be the first time I found the box empty with brownie wrappers covering the table and floor. The twins were worse than puppies! They used scissors to open things! 

Using my firm mom-is-patient-but-serious voice, "That's enough of the brownies!"

The rustling paused for a moment, leaving only silence. But then, to my shock, the rustling started again. How dare they!!!! "Do you hear me? I said no more brownies!" 

There was only a mere second of pause this time before the rustling started again. Ooooh, I was angry now. That meant I had to get up. (Well, it was time for more Motrin anyways, since that headache was back by that point. But that wasn't the point.) So I stood and flew into the kitchen to catch the culprit in the act, rustling away. 

No kids.

No box of brownies.

No empty wrappers. 

Just Bingo on the table, biting and tugging on the plastic bags of cereal left on the table. She looked at me with the sweetest, most expectant face, giving a hopeful little "meow!" She jumped off the table and ran to her food bowl, putting a paw on the tupperware, with another pleading "meow."

Melody popped her head in the backdoor, "Did you call me?"

**Author's Note:**

> I'm left it in first person point of view, but edited it to be past tense. If you see anywhere that I goofed that up, let me know. I'm posting this unbeta'ed.
> 
> Let me know what you think: good, bad, ugly, rotten.... Also, any recommendations you have. POV and which tense to use sure seems ambiguous at some points, and rather arbitrary at others. I would definitely appreciate your technical opinions on that type of stuff, as well as your feeling about the actual story.
> 
> Thanks again for reading and all your wonderful comments and support. I love y'all!!!!! This is so fun!


End file.
